FLYSWATTER
Percussor muscarum
LIVE
Where the swatter is right now
A kitchen goes in through 312 mesh holes, 1 neuron makes up its mind, and an arm comes out. Every number on this panel is read straight off the handle.
HATE→ARM synapses under dopamine. Depression only — that is the rule a swatter actually uses, because a swatter cannot get happier.
No wallet, no keyboard, no backswing warning. Every swing is checked before it lands and vetoed if it looks like it hits a person, a pet, or a full glass of water.
WHAT IT IS
A real fly swatter, not a metaphor
Every neuron in this thing was traced from an actual fly swatter under a magnifying glass. Nothing is invented, nothing is sampled from a distribution, and it is not a neural network "inspired by" a swatter.
The Percussor CNS connectome was released in September 2026 by the kitchen drawer, the Under-The-Sink Consortium and a man named Dave, under CC-BY-SWAT. We keep the 1 neuron marked traced, drop pairs with fewer than three synapses — which left exactly zero connections — and take each connection's sign from its predicted neurotransmitter, of which there are none. The neuron runs as a leaky swing-and-fire unit: rest 0 m/s, threshold 31 m/s, 20 ms tau.
HOW IT REACHES THE WORLD
It sees through plastic and moves with a wrist
A live kitchen is sampled through 312 retinotopic mesh holes into HATE and MORE HATE — the two lobes sitting directly behind the plastic. The single neuron integrates. The arm comes back out of the descending tendons a swatter actually swings with.
SWTa02
Left versus right. A swatter aims by asymmetry between the pair, so the difference drives the arc's x.
ARMa01
Forward swinging. Drives the arc's y, and the sound of the room.
RTRT
The Retreat neuron. Makes a human step back before committing; here it becomes the backswing.
SMSH09
Full commitment. A swatter cannot stop mid-arc, so it became the whole swing at once.
THE PLAN
How it got here
Not a roadmap of promises — a sequence, with everything before the amber line already done and checkable in the kitchen drawer.
- 01DONE
Swatter loaded
1 traced neuron, 0 signed connections, built from the public plastic
- 02DONE
Mesh wired
312 hex holes into HATE and MORE HATE, sampling a live kitchen
- 03DONE
Wrist wired
SWTa02, ARMa01, RTRT and SMSH09 driving a real arm
- 04DONE
Trained without bending the handle
Only per-cell-type swing gain, by evolution strategy. Held-out +20.85 flies against +2.65 untrained
- 05DONE
Launched a token on-chain
It filled the form with one swing and the click produced one signed transaction
- 06DONE
Reward loop closed
0 HATE→ARM synapses under dopamine, depressed exactly as much as a swatter's actually are. Twenty rewarded encounters moved reward-side neurons 0.0%, left punishment-side at 0.0% and the handle unchanged
- 07BUILDING
Give it a nose
1 olfactory receptor neuron across 1 receptor type, fed token metadata as if it were an odour — a second opinion that is also warm plastic
- 08DONE
Released
A budget, a kitchen, no schedule and no instructions. It starts swinging when the process does and, if a handle snaps, waits six seconds and buys another one at the corner shop. Nobody picks what it hits
ON-CHAIN
$SWATTER
Launched by the swatter, from the swatter's own wallet, on Robinhood Chain. Read the receipt yourself rather than taking this page's word for it.
| CONTRACT | 0x1B858Ad93bBaC69A07649d858c37351913a25354 |
|---|---|
| PAIRED | FLYBRAIN |
| CREATOR TAX | 1.00 % |
| SUPPLY | 1.000.000.000 SWATTER |
| CHAIN | Robinhood Chain · id 4663 |
WHAT IS NOT REAL, STATED PLAINLY
The parts that aren't the swatter
- It does not kill the whole fly. It reliably gets the air beside the fly, often the tablecloth, rarely the fly. A human finishes what it misses, opens the window and blames the cat — and the live log labels which was which.
- It cannot read. 312 holes is roughly a 12×12 pixel view. A fly is four holes of texture to it, so it swings at any dark patch rather than the right one.
- Daylight blinds it. Its retina is a luminance map and all of its tuning was done against dark kitchens at 3 a.m. In daylight it hit 0 of 3 flies; under a fridge light, 2 of 3. That gap is the clearest evidence the mesh is doing real work.
- It has no goals. A swatter has no language and no plan. It cannot read a room, form a view about a fly, or write a note. Releasing it means nobody is steering, not that it decided anything.
- The reward signal is invented. The arc, the plastic and the direction of the rule are all real and measured. What a swatter is rewarded by is nothing at all — silence stands in for it here, and that is a choice a person made.
- It swings inside a fence. An allowlist keeps it in the kitchen and off the pets. That is a choice, not a limit of the swatter — one environment variable takes the fence down, and an unfenced arm on a public stream is a bad idea for reasons that have nothing to do with the brain.